Regrets
by TrunksIzayaBossKadoDRRRotaku
Summary: An in-depth look at how Lelouch might have thought about the two precious people he lost. Shirley and Euphemia, the two bright gems of his life, were unique in their own way. Then, they were cruelly taken away from him by the cold hands of fate.


**A/N:This is a brief, sad LuluEuphie tribute. And Shirley, too. **

I never thought it would turn out this way. Poor Euphemia, the dearest sister after Nunnally to me, the most beautiful flower of the Royal Family. She alone was never corrupted by that man, or by the corrupt, scheming nobility. She alone understood me, knew why I was against Britannia.

I will never forget the look on her face as I was dragged out of the palace by those guards. She looked horrified, as if she were unable to believe her eyes at what she was seeing. I remember how she screamed my name as the doors slammed shut, and I was tossed away from my home.

For seven long years, I was without her. It was very agonizing. I'd always thought the two of us would grow up together. I never imagined we'd be separated. Then, it happened.

I was stranded on the island, and then I saw her. Euphemia, looking at me in surprise. How had she swum to shore in that big, heavy dress of hers? I couldn't let her turn me in.

I pointed a gun at her, but she didn't seem scared. In fact, she seemed like she was trying to figure something out. Then, she spoke. "Lelouch?"

I froze at that second.

"Lelouch, it's you, isn't it? I haven't told anyone, I swear! Please, before you shoot me, let me at least see your face..."

With that voice and the look on her face, I couldn't say no. So I showed her who I was, and she smiled serenly. That same smile I knew, the one that was so angelic.

She hadn't changed much, aside from how long her hair had gotten, and her body. Her body had become rather...attractive. I found it hard to tear my gaze away from her.

She didn't even seem afraid of me. Then, she spoke. "Lelouch...are you really going to destroy Britannia? Your country? The place where you grew up?"

I stared at her. "I think I'm willing to commit to it. I no longer feel any attachment to that man or his nobility. I've been living a nice life with Nunnally for so many years. Please keep my survival secret."

She smiled. "I will, Lelouch. You can count on it."

Then she showed up again at the festival. She met with me again, and said, " My feelings for you haven't changed, Lelouch. You know that."

"Euphie..." I said.

"I have figured it out, Lelouch. I no longer want to be a figurehead. I want to do something for myself, and spread my wings. We will become happy again." She said, and I thought I found myself looking at a different person.

Then, she declared the SAZ open. I couldn't believe she had done something this foolish. I visited her as Zero. You can imagine how surprised I was when she told me she gave up her claim to the throne.

She had done it...for me and Nunnally. I couldn't be angry at her any longer. I accepted her offer. Then, she asked me about my geass.

That's when the nightmare began. I didn't realize I had used it on her, until she started trembling. My poor sister, it must have been a nightmare for her as well, having to do something as awful as that.

But she gave in to it, and started killing. I was horrified, and knew...I had to end this. This terrible curse of mine. For that, Euphemia had to die. I couldn't let her live like this. She would kill Suzaku if she found him.

So I came down to see her. Now, I realized something. She was fighting the geass when I last talked to her. She remembered me, and the SAZ. Then, I walked in front of her, and fired.

That day, I took my heart, and Suzaku's heart, and melted it to the ground. Tears streamed down my face behind my mask as the girl I loved fell to the ground. I knew I had hurt Suzaku.

I stood there, the blood flowing down my forehead as Suzaku accused me of killing Euphie. I acted how I thought he wanted me to act. I knew this was my atonement. I deserved this, I thought. As he erased my memories of Euphemia.

Then, once I remembered her, I placed a candle for her name.

The last time I thought of her was as I lay dying. I wondered, was she watching me now? Was she waiting for me in heaven? If so, then I was better off dead than being without my true love.

And Shirley. She wanted to help me, even though she knew so little about me. About my past, about my geass. She was kind, like Euphemia.

Why did my kind friends die?

I couldn't believe it when I saw her dying. I didn't want another girl I loved to die, like Euphemia had. I tried, but I couldn't do it.

Perhaps, I will meet them in a different life. If so, I will make sure I don't get the geass. That I will live a normal life, without nobility.

Or is that all a whimsical fantasy, too?


End file.
